Things I have learned from Ted

The Ex got the Princess a very cute, very hairy puppy for Christmas last year.  She named him Teddy and visited him at the Ex’s house every other weekend.  Brilliant move by the Ex. 

Since the Ex is currently "between houses", he asked me if I wouldn’t mind taking care of Ted (I refuse to call the dog by anything requiring more than the utterance of one syllable) for a little while.  The Princess was ecstatic.  Brilliant move by the Ex.

Checkmate.

Ted has been with us for about a month now.  He’s really very sweet and I have a hard time being bitter about having something else to take care of when he’s so damn happy to see me all the time. 

Which brings me to….unexpected things I’ve learned from having a dog again…

First, we apparently have a major snail problem in Northern California and its’ really really gross.

I don’t generally go outside after dark, unless it involves taking the elevator to the parking garage.  But now I have to walk the dog.  Evidently, the sprinklers come on after dark and the snails come out EN MASSE.  It’s impossible to walk along any sidewalk in my complex without stepping on the damn things.  It’s like walking through a field of snail landmines.  What was that crunching noise? Did I just step on glass?  Oh gross. 

Second, hide your hairbrush.

Conversation with the Princess last night:

Princess: “Mommy!  Look!  Doesn’t Ted look cute?”

Me: “Of course he does.  Did you brush him?”

Princess: “Yes!”

Me: “Did you brush him with the $75 Frederic Fekkai hairbrush in your hand?”

Princess: “Um……”

Third, dogs are therapeutic. 

My apartment is starting to smell like dog.  The management company will raise my rent if they find him here.  I hate picking up poop.  He occasionally yaks up a snail or two on my living room carpet.

I’m getting attached.

I’m also starting to think that the Ex is never going to reclaim this dog.

Brilliant move by the Ex.